








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 386 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1722 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,798 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2861 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1937 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3019 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1981 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $641,078 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 29 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SOL1DUDE | 57% | 68 |
| #2 | R0$4 | 48% | 98 |
| #3 | cyberaser | 48% | 63 |
| #4 | Nidorino | 47% | 15 |
| #5 | dim8 | 46% | 82 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | TackoO | 32% | 38 |
| #12 | Tauboga | 31% | 16 |
| #13 | Sir Vive | 29% | 28 |
| #14 | Bobbes | 28% | 39 |
| #15 | NiVal | 24% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dim8 | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | SOL1DUDE | 4 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | R0$4 | 3 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | cyberaser | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Mr_J_Reese | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dim8 | 234 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | R0$4 | 176 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #3 | SOL1DUDE | 164 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #4 | cyberaser | 145 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | S1rv1v4L | 94 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SOL1DUDE | +3.41 | 84 | 62 |
| #2 | Tauboga | +2.98 | 83 | 71 |
| #3 | dim8 | +2.36 | 63 | 78 |
| #4 | R0$4 | +1.51 | 81 | 62 |
| #5 | Maschock | +1.10 | 68 | 61 |





