








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 124 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1049 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,428 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1120 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1214 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1082 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1012 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $391,070 of utility $154 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 113 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Umulig | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | TOMM3H | 83% | 6 |
| #3 | Relko | 73% | 11 |
| #4 | Arne R Cool | 67% | 6 |
| #5 | cACAYA | 67% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cACAYA | 131 | 0.32 | 4 min |
| #2 | dj øssi, CRÉATIVE TECHNOLOGIE | 121 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #3 | Agress!v_^ | 107 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | weetdolphin | 56 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #5 | Hansen | 38 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | weetdolphin | +4.20 | 75 | 67 |
| #2 | kung fu kenny | +3.43 | 74 | 66 |
| #3 | Umulig | +3.31 | 78 | 73 |
| #4 | Hansen | +2.42 | 57 | 82 |
| #5 | Agress!v_^ | +1.89 | 74 | 71 |





