








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 679 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 150 matches | ||
| Faceit | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4611 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,513 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2777 | 19% |
| Smokes | 5042 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 3334 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3360 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,378,050 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 632 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pat | 73% | 44 |
| #2 | ビ ケ🎤🐀 | 63% | 27 |
| #3 | Bayloc | 63% | 48 |
| #4 | kami | 59% | 32 |
| #5 | Debased Bowie | 58% | 180 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | I NUTTED | 57% | 197 |
| #8 | .q | 54% | 117 |
| #9 | nissan altimommy | 49% | 81 |
| #10 | neenick | 46% | 28 |
| #11 | Minismog | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hku | 13 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | .q | 12 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | Debased Bowie | 10 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | I NUTTED | 8 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | nissan altimommy | 5 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | .q | 454 | 0.19 | 12 min |
| #2 | hku | 422 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #3 | I NUTTED | 171 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #4 | pat | 146 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #5 | ビ ケ🎤🐀 | 132 | 0.23 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hku | +3.17 | 84 | 60 |
| #2 | pupper | +2.50 | 79 | 66 |
| #3 | ビ ケ🎤🐀 | +1.75 | 79 | 63 |
| #4 | Bayloc | +1.65 | 72 | 61 |
| #5 | neenick | +0.63 | 87 | 65 |





