








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 411 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 145 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2449 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,657 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1157 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1116 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 838 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1546 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $838,873 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 390 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dolzy | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | Matt [M] | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | strAtus | 59% | 88 |
| #4 | CONVICT | 57% | 186 |
| #5 | brake | 55% | 173 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | onion man | 640 | 0.25 | 19 min |
| #2 | CONVICT | 567 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | brake | 436 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #4 | strAtus | 302 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #5 | Grampz | 208 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dolzy | +2.94 | 90 | 64 |
| #2 | CONVICT | +2.60 | 80 | 62 |
| #3 | WanderingWithJ | +1.97 | 90 | 56 |
| #4 | strAtus | +0.98 | 67 | 67 |
| #5 | onion man | -0.50 | 68 | 72 |





