








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 317 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 425 matches | ||
| Faceit | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 52 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3815 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,312 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1025 | 10% |
| Smokes | 4080 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 2047 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3160 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,134,160 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 822 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sully | 59% | 46 |
| #2 | §amm¥ | 52% | 96 |
| #3 | nstasiak2 | 50% | 346 |
| #4 | Hyper | 50% | 321 |
| #5 | Doc | 50% | 154 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Hyper | 50% | 321 |
| #5 | Doc | 50% | 154 |
| #6 | Mazbu | 49% | 244 |
| #7 | Meow Bitch | 41% | 86 |
| #8 | Vladimir | 37% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hyper | 24 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | nstasiak2 | 21 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Mazbu | 10 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | §amm¥ | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Meow Bitch | 7 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nstasiak2 | 1224 | 0.16 | 29 min |
| #2 | Hyper | 1005 | 0.14 | 24 min |
| #3 | Mazbu | 236 | 0.04 | 6 min |
| #4 | Doc | 154 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #5 | sully | 136 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sully | +2.25 | 79 | 59 |
| #2 | Hyper | +1.09 | 71 | 57 |
| #3 | Meow Bitch | +0.81 | 47 | 57 |
| #4 | nstasiak2 | +0.59 | 53 | 63 |
| #5 | ChillinDan | -0.18 | 53 | 38 |





