








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 182 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 127 matches | ||
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Esplay | 26 matches | 1,703 | |
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1708 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,472 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2089 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3332 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 937 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 2114 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $711,217 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 56 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mythix | 57% | 68 |
| #2 | Ibrahim Baylan | 56% | 171 |
| #3 | bussmicke | 54% | 13 |
| #4 | YungOlof | 53% | 128 |
| #5 | Ienart | 53% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | YungOlof | 53% | 128 |
| #5 | Ienart | 53% | 100 |
| #6 | E.S.P | 53% | 146 |
| #7 | ΑΡΗΣ | 51% | 35 |
| #8 | Lulz;)<3 | 38% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ibrahim Baylan | 5 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | E.S.P | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | YungOlof | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | Ienart | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | ΑΡΗΣ | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ibrahim Baylan | 730 | 0.20 | 20 min |
| #2 | E.S.P | 709 | 0.23 | 20 min |
| #3 | YungOlof | 221 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | Ienart | 215 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #5 | Mythix | 214 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ibrahim Baylan | +2.92 | 79 | 69 |
| #2 | Mythix | +2.04 | 91 | 69 |
| #3 | E.S.P | +1.28 | 67 | 77 |
| #4 | ΑΡΗΣ | +0.86 | 58 | 70 |
| #5 | Ienart | -0.03 | 64 | 58 |





