








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 877 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 772 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 244 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




103 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6148 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 44,291 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12233 | 28% |
| Smokes | 12122 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 10525 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 9411 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,402,237 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1205 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VERDAMMTE AXT!!! | 49% | 271 |
| #2 | Memi | 47% | 135 |
| #3 | GGbuorsa | 47% | 217 |
| #4 | [CDHE]Schamoul | 45% | 75 |
| #5 | Aless22 | 40% | 124 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VERDAMMTE AXT!!! | 49% | 271 |
| #2 | Memi | 47% | 135 |
| #3 | GGbuorsa | 47% | 217 |
| #4 | [CDHE]Schamoul | 45% | 75 |
| #5 | Aless22 | 40% | 124 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Memi | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | GGbuorsa | 8 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Aless22 | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | [CDHE]Schamoul | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | VERDAMMTE AXT!!! | 1 | 0.0002 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GGbuorsa | 519 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #2 | VERDAMMTE AXT!!! | 345 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| #3 | Memi | 102 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #4 | Aless22 | 49 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | [CDHE]Schamoul | 24 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GGbuorsa | +2.28 | 64 | 79 |
| #2 | Zowie | +0.78 | 78 | 73 |
| #3 | Memi | -0.26 | 44 | 57 |
| #4 | VERDAMMTE AXT!!! | -1.83 | 55 | 58 |
| #5 | [CDHE]Schamoul | -2.08 | 23 | 39 |





