








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 438 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 565 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5919 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,992 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1051 | 7% |
| Smokes | 5229 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 5301 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 3411 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,043,100 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1010 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nospoon | 49% | 61 |
| #2 | Suck a Foo | 47% | 185 |
| #3 | 1ckd | 44% | 225 |
| #4 | conqqy | 44% | 115 |
| #5 | cloudwalker | 44% | 283 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Future Hendrix | 42% | 59 |
| #11 | jsc_xD | 42% | 176 |
| #12 | LexG | 41% | 82 |
| #13 | A1kaline | 41% | 252 |
| #14 | Named King | 33% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bloodrich | 24 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | cloudwalker | 18 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | A1kaline | 16 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | 1ckd | 16 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | jsc_xD | 10 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bloodrich | 1429 | 0.18 | 45 min |
| #2 | 1ckd | 785 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #3 | jsc_xD | 637 | 0.17 | 18 min |
| #4 | A1kaline | 584 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #5 | cloudwalker | 528 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1ckd | +1.58 | 76 | 61 |
| #2 | Bloodrich | +1.41 | 53 | 77 |
| #3 | jpz | +1.12 | 71 | 50 |
| #4 | nospoon | +0.96 | 81 | 35 |
| #5 | cloudwalker | +0.34 | 64 | 57 |





