








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 572 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1041 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




44 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8582 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,721 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11678 | 38% |
| Smokes | 6490 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 6882 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5671 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,304,780 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1524 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Named King | 53% | 89 |
| #2 | LexG | 53% | 116 |
| #3 | nospoon | 51% | 122 |
| #4 | jpz | 50% | 332 |
| #5 | ItzaHoudini | 49% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Bloodrich | 45% | 527 |
| #11 | 1ckd | 45% | 393 |
| #12 | conqqy | 45% | 152 |
| #13 | kin3tix | 44% | 283 |
| #14 | Future Hendrix | 41% | 125 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 1ckd | 16 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | A1kaline | 15 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Bloodrich | 13 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | kin3tix | 11 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | jsc_xD | 9 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bloodrich | 1884 | 0.17 | 59 min |
| #2 | 1ckd | 1445 | 0.18 | 31 min |
| #3 | jsc_xD | 1126 | 0.17 | 31 min |
| #4 | A1kaline | 846 | 0.10 | 24 min |
| #5 | jpz | 786 | 0.11 | 15 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bloodrich | +1.26 | 52 | 76 |
| #2 | 1ckd | +1.22 | 78 | 63 |
| #3 | nospoon | +1.04 | 77 | 41 |
| #4 | cloudwalker | +0.45 | 64 | 54 |
| #5 | jpz | +0.30 | 72 | 46 |





