








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 557 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 931 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 84 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6902 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,865 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1948 | 9% |
| Smokes | 7318 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 7597 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 4002 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $5,676,922 of utility $267 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 60 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wokiie | 52% | 121 |
| #2 | HolyGuardianAngel | 47% | 137 |
| #3 | Dam | 46% | 81 |
| #4 | Lo2_leif | 45% | 76 |
| #5 | wylffi | 42% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HolyGuardianAngel | 12 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | The-Ronnibajer | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Wokiie | 7 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | wylffi | 5 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | Dam | 4 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The-Ronnibajer | 437 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #2 | HolyGuardianAngel | 376 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| #3 | Dam | 150 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Lo2_leif | 144 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | Wokiie | 110 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HolyGuardianAngel | +3.04 | 64 | 73 |
| #2 | The-Ronnibajer | +1.03 | 62 | 71 |
| #3 | Wokiie | +0.27 | 52 | 47 |
| #4 | Lo2_leif | +0.16 | 34 | 73 |
| #5 | wylffi | -0.04 | 58 | 42 |





