








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1250 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 350 matches | ||
| Premier | 231 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 75 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8449 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,859 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4736 | 15% |
| Smokes | 8446 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 9981 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 7696 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,431,824 of utility $171 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 610 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | itsroT | 56% | 306 |
| #2 | bobby | 56% | 90 |
| #3 | blst | 54% | 69 |
| #4 | Crash | 54% | 127 |
| #5 | dANNY | 51% | 439 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dANNY | 20 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | itsroT | 12 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | ile | 8 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | SaMi | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | bobby | 5 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dANNY | 2591 | 0.30 | 79 min |
| #2 | ile | 916 | 0.16 | 23 min |
| #3 | itsroT | 707 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #4 | SaMi | 343 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #5 | blst | 240 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dANNY | +1.78 | 86 | 77 |
| #2 | bobby | +1.31 | 81 | 57 |
| #3 | itsroT | +0.86 | 71 | 63 |
| #4 | ile | +0.81 | 69 | 62 |
| #5 | SaMi | +0.68 | 75 | 63 |





