








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1663 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 291 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 127 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 58 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9058 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,454 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7672 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2902 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 5119 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5761 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,910,874 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2183 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sleep deprivation | 63% | 87 |
| #2 | Evaluationlooper | 61% | 129 |
| #3 | ♿ dLj ♿ | 59% | 145 |
| #4 | Ratlosky is a glorper | 57% | 46 |
| #5 | mobiusdyck | 56% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lichy 𐂯 | 596 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #2 | sleep deprivation | 498 | 0.28 | 13 min |
| #3 | ♿ dLj ♿ | 423 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #4 | fool | 287 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #5 | Swamp | 226 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sleep deprivation | +4.76 | 75 | 68 |
| #2 | lichy 𐂯 | +2.57 | 82 | 56 |
| #3 | Kaczer | +2.50 | 74 | 56 |
| #4 | Ratlosky is a glorper | +1.85 | 67 | 51 |
| #5 | fool | +1.55 | 59 | 43 |





