








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 531 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 208 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 63 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3261 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,143 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1593 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2327 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3076 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3147 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,294,218 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 465 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Narmonox | 52% | 33 |
| #2 | CuRRy the Viper | 47% | 19 |
| #3 | ✪SCufFeX | 45% | 108 |
| #4 | Cherry | 45% | 161 |
| #5 | iT´s_noobY™ summacum.works | 43% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JaxX | 5 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | Cherry | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | iT´s_noobY™ summacum.works | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | <EiErnaCkeN GoEs InfEcted> | 2 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | ✪SCufFeX | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | iT´s_noobY™ summacum.works | 322 | 0.17 | 6 min |
| #2 | Cherry | 257 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | JaxX | 141 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | Own4IcoN | 121 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Narmonox | 109 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CuRRy the Viper | +3.80 | 72 | 76 |
| #2 | iT´s_noobY™ summacum.works | +3.03 | 71 | 67 |
| #3 | D!ck@ | +0.74 | 76 | 63 |
| #4 | <EiErnaCkeN GoEs InfEcted> | -0.00 | 62 | 60 |
| #5 | ✪SCufFeX | -1.25 | 74 | 49 |





