








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 358 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 198 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2466 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,389 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2326 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2390 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2924 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2749 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $878,714 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 203 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phatle | 51% | 109 |
| #2 | Trendsettaren | 50% | 105 |
| #3 | Earl Simmons | 49% | 142 |
| #4 | gusj | 49% | 145 |
| #5 | Tore Kæsj | 48% | 155 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Earl Simmons | 49% | 142 |
| #4 | gusj | 49% | 145 |
| #5 | Tore Kæsj | 48% | 155 |
| #6 | Halvprinsen | 47% | 117 |
| #7 | nurlosaurus | 41% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gusj | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Halvprinsen | 7 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Tore Kæsj | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Earl Simmons | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Phatle | 3 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gusj | 511 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #2 | Earl Simmons | 434 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #3 | Tore Kæsj | 300 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | Phatle | 245 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | Trendsettaren | 178 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gusj | +2.19 | 73 | 70 |
| #2 | Tore Kæsj | +1.23 | 70 | 61 |
| #3 | steffen | +1.00 | 72 | 63 |
| #4 | nurlosaurus | +0.95 | 69 | 56 |
| #5 | Trendsettaren | -0.31 | 55 | 54 |





