








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 172 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 129 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2020 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,280 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2850 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2028 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1596 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1806 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $568,847 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 85 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fortune | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Dennis the menace | 64% | 33 |
| #3 | Osnaskater | 61% | 57 |
| #4 | Konzera´s Wrld | 60% | 30 |
| #5 | DeMoN | 58% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wudey ⭕⃤ | 7 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | Osnaskater | 6 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | TimSta | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | ★WaitWhat?! | 4 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | Spitzkopf Larry | 4 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wudey ⭕⃤ | 186 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #2 | ★WaitWhat?! | 169 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | Aschi | 101 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #4 | TimSta | 88 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Spitzkopf Larry | 88 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fortune | +2.53 | 83 | 71 |
| #2 | TakTazzz | +2.49 | 91 | 60 |
| #3 | mazeツ @LAN | +2.13 | 77 | 69 |
| #4 | TimSta | +2.12 | 85 | 67 |
| #5 | ★WaitWhat?! | +2.01 | 54 | 78 |





