








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 654 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 463 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4869 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,753 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4357 | 20% |
| Smokes | 6199 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 6313 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 4884 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,958,901 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 398 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StructurE | 56% | 61 |
| #2 | Bendmydik Completelyback | 54% | 46 |
| #3 | Camsauce | 52% | 302 |
| #4 | Ser Monk | 52% | 276 |
| #5 | The Wizard #1 Sorcerer | 51% | 264 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | The Wizard #1 Sorcerer | 51% | 264 |
| #6 | Structur | 50% | 38 |
| #7 | tom | 50% | 62 |
| #8 | dadderino cappuccino | 48% | 215 |
| #9 | true brexit geezer | 43% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ser Monk | 11 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Camsauce | 7 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | The Wizard #1 Sorcerer | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | dadderino cappuccino | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Bendmydik Completelyback | 4 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ser Monk | 846 | 0.14 | 19 min |
| #2 | Camsauce | 442 | 0.07 | 14 min |
| #3 | dadderino cappuccino | 307 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #4 | The Wizard #1 Sorcerer | 278 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| #5 | tom | 278 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | true brexit geezer | +1.70 | 71 | 65 |
| #2 | StructurE | +1.24 | 79 | 70 |
| #3 | tom | +1.00 | 82 | 72 |
| #4 | The Wizard #1 Sorcerer | +0.95 | 63 | 58 |
| #5 | Camsauce | +0.69 | 64 | 70 |





