








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 661 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 315 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8413 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,771 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7875 | 25% |
| Smokes | 8236 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 9484 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 6176 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,191,483 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 447 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xs3ro ♥ | 57% | 60 |
| #2 | DingDong_Mofo | 56% | 52 |
| #3 | kuckuck | 55% | 83 |
| #4 | MILCHMANN | 51% | 469 |
| #5 | ricola vs. toblerone | 50% | 377 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Shizzl | 47% | 134 |
| #9 | IEL | 43% | 54 |
| #10 | Dr.Pseudo | 42% | 73 |
| #11 | ꧁♥ Sunny ♥꧂ | 39% | 61 |
| #12 | specture239 | 38% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MILCHMANN | 18 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | ricola vs. toblerone | 7 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | LuVRAPTOR | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Yoshi | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | kuckuck | 5 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MILCHMANN | 665 | 0.07 | 18 min |
| #2 | Yoshi | 346 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | LuVRAPTOR | 284 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #4 | kuckuck | 261 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #5 | Shizzl | 203 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kuckuck | +4.85 | 86 | 62 |
| #2 | MILCHMANN | +2.83 | 64 | 63 |
| #3 | LuVRAPTOR | +1.23 | 65 | 72 |
| #4 | xs3ro ♥ | +0.80 | 67 | 76 |
| #5 | Ryan Stekken aka Karl Rasur | +0.10 | 81 | 67 |





