








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 974 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 216 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 37 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 31 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 85 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5892 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,768 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4650 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4134 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 7213 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 3771 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,784,351 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 93 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xs3ro ♥ | 68% | 41 |
| #2 | _adeL | 65% | 55 |
| #3 | Habibi Blocksberg | 61% | 38 |
| #4 | Klibink | 58% | 33 |
| #5 | Redchip | 57% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Ryan Stekken aka Karl Rasur | 49% | 202 |
| #12 | FeLix[L]🍀 | 48% | 62 |
| #13 | Yoshi | 45% | 71 |
| #14 | ricola vs. toblerone | 45% | 151 |
| #15 | specture239 | 44% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ryan Stekken aka Karl Rasur | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | MILCHMANN | 4 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | Redchip | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Shizzl | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Klibink | 3 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MILCHMANN | 328 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #2 | Ryan Stekken aka Karl Rasur | 324 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | Shizzl | 290 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | SpleX | 278 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #5 | kraeuti | 189 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | _adeL | +3.03 | 86 | 64 |
| #2 | xs3ro ♥ | +2.53 | 73 | 77 |
| #3 | MILCHMANN | +2.37 | 63 | 65 |
| #4 | LuVRAPTOR | +1.84 | 66 | 72 |
| #5 | SpleX | +0.57 | 84 | 75 |





