








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 458 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 187 matches | ||
| Faceit | 92 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3263 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,099 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4143 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4039 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2354 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2563 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,159,851 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 693 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fubbu | 67% | 27 |
| #2 | sIkLe | 56% | 52 |
| #3 | [EWA] ÜßЗЯ | 56% | 221 |
| #4 | IVI | 55% | 53 |
| #5 | Legreid | 54% | 244 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Legreid | 54% | 244 |
| #6 | Gjøs ☕ | 54% | 181 |
| #7 | MrTeddyBear | 53% | 260 |
| #8 | eriK | 51% | 125 |
| #9 | Epidydemis | 35% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [EWA] ÜßЗЯ | 7 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | MrTeddyBear | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | Gjøs ☕ | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Legreid | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | eriK | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Legreid | 849 | 0.17 | 24 min |
| #2 | MrTeddyBear | 627 | 0.12 | 19 min |
| #3 | Gjøs ☕ | 509 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #4 | [EWA] ÜßЗЯ | 463 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #5 | sIkLe | 168 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sIkLe | +2.82 | 70 | 69 |
| #2 | Andy ☕ | +2.48 | 78 | 67 |
| #3 | MrTeddyBear | +1.01 | 60 | 69 |
| #4 | Gjøs ☕ | +0.38 | 76 | 70 |
| #5 | Fubbu | +0.12 | 63 | 73 |





