








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 808 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 354 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3585 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,751 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3431 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3711 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2922 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3687 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,852,671 of utility $216 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1925 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Havremoped | 50% | 105 |
| #2 | Él Mòppo | 45% | 109 |
| #3 | King Georg ♣ | 44% | 225 |
| #4 | FresҚe | 44% | 343 |
| #5 | LeDownsTiger/Linder | 42% | 273 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | LeDownsTiger/Linder | 42% | 273 |
| #6 | Jocke | 42% | 73 |
| #7 | slay | 42% | 64 |
| #8 | langen | 40% | 55 |
| #9 | Vallonen | 40% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LeDownsTiger/Linder | 16 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | FresҚe | 8 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | King Georg ♣ | 5 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Havremoped | 4 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Él Mòppo | 3 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FresҚe | 1189 | 0.16 | 28 min |
| #2 | LeDownsTiger/Linder | 521 | 0.09 | 15 min |
| #3 | King Georg ♣ | 345 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #4 | Él Mòppo | 264 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #5 | Havremoped | 215 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LeDownsTiger/Linder | +2.45 | 84 | 62 |
| #2 | KALLINZOOOR | +0.74 | 67 | 65 |
| #3 | FresҚe | -0.60 | 55 | 63 |
| #4 | slay | -0.82 | 72 | 42 |
| #5 | Havremoped | -0.85 | 54 | 61 |





