








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1916 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1441 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 110 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




85 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
15795 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 56,300 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 18494 | 33% |
| Smokes | 10455 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 13207 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 14144 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,894,543 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1484 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Risky Business | 47% | 139 |
| #2 | chudmuska | 45% | 130 |
| #3 | FINALBOSS | 45% | 86 |
| #4 | oc | 43% | 102 |
| #5 | Trashcan | 40% | 149 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Risky Business | 47% | 139 |
| #2 | chudmuska | 45% | 130 |
| #3 | FINALBOSS | 45% | 86 |
| #4 | oc | 43% | 102 |
| #5 | Trashcan | 40% | 149 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Risky Business | 8 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | oc | 7 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | chudmuska | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Trashcan | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | FINALBOSS | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Risky Business | 681 | 0.22 | 16 min |
| #2 | oc | 339 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | chudmuska | 322 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #4 | Trashcan | 280 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #5 | FINALBOSS | 90 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oc | +1.68 | 76 | 69 |
| #2 | Two Wine Glass In | +0.37 | 69 | 61 |
| #3 | FINALBOSS | +0.33 | 59 | 50 |
| #4 | Risky Business | +0.05 | 69 | 71 |
| #5 | chudmuska | -0.64 | 50 | 67 |





