








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 390 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 518 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7568 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 34,286 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9381 | 27% |
| Smokes | 10996 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 7106 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 6803 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,809,470 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 290 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | hailhades | 46% | 283 |
| #7 | Two Wine Glass In | 45% | 130 |
| #8 | Zong | 45% | 274 |
| #9 | Risky Business | 45% | 105 |
| #10 | .Blaze | 43% | 234 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Truesh0t(Not Mad) | 598 | 0.06 | 17 min |
| #2 | Burntmoose | 595 | 0.23 | 17 min |
| #3 | Risky Business | 511 | 0.21 | 12 min |
| #4 | Two Wine Glass In | 449 | 0.16 | 12 min |
| #5 | hailhades | 360 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Burntmoose | +2.42 | 73 | 73 |
| #2 | .Blaze | +0.63 | 69 | 46 |
| #3 | Risky Business | +0.57 | 75 | 75 |
| #4 | Zong | +0.47 | 61 | 56 |
| #5 | Truesh0t(Not Mad) | +0.27 | 52 | 58 |





