








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 502 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 208 matches | ||
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3608 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,411 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4304 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3698 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3574 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2835 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,174,845 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 27 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Työstäjä | 70% | 44 |
| #2 | TheduaD | 68% | 57 |
| #3 | RMCRXW | 65% | 34 |
| #4 | kuntteri | 53% | 235 |
| #5 | MrPerky | 52% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TaisteluJaska | 8 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | Verttii | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | TheduaD | 6 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | OuJee | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | kuntteri | 4 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OuJee | 1408 | 0.25 | 38 min |
| #2 | Verttii | 787 | 0.21 | 22 min |
| #3 | kuntteri | 678 | 0.13 | 19 min |
| #4 | TaisteluJaska | 248 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| #5 | TheduaD | 173 | 0.14 | 5 min |





