








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 286 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 296 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 73 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2985 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,236 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3741 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3291 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2868 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1336 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,342,591 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 486 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lutchas | 69% | 26 |
| #2 | Lokoeu | 50% | 18 |
| #3 | Filhote de Gambá | 48% | 21 |
| #4 | nkS | 45% | 38 |
| #5 | dr fuqueras | 43% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Filhote de Gambá | +4.00 | 83 | 44 |
| #2 | Cabelo de Boneca | +1.78 | 80 | 36 |
| #3 | twitch.tv/joao_be7 | +0.98 | 63 | 63 |
| #4 | nkS | +0.14 | 65 | 59 |
| #5 | arg is back on track | +0.05 | 57 | 65 |





