








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 78 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 136 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2004 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,876 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2816 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2147 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2699 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3214 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $634,726 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dd | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | fan of zet | 64% | 44 |
| #3 | Tao Bai Bai | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | Jordanskyyy | 56% | 25 |
| #5 | SKAFDS | 51% | 184 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SKAFDS | 19 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Yunoc | 9 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | OG Cripweis Bongsheesh | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | RealblockHu$tler | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | GernhartReinholzen | 3 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yunoc | 636 | 0.20 | 19 min |
| #2 | OG Cripweis Bongsheesh | 622 | 0.24 | 15 min |
| #3 | SKAFDS | 569 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #4 | RealblockHu$tler | 309 | 0.18 | 10 min |
| #5 | Deli | 125 | 0.09 | 4 min |





