








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 933 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 413 matches | ||
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 103 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9561 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,403 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4408 | 17% |
| Smokes | 9413 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 6216 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5366 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,050,115 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 612 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ADZoR1 | 65% | 130 |
| #2 | Tall1 | 63% | 144 |
| #3 | MattyR | 62% | 197 |
| #4 | ADZoR! | 58% | 214 |
| #5 | Kawshun! | 58% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ADZoR! | 17 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | SKIZ | 11 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | turtz | 10 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Mikle | 8 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | s1Rprizzle | 8 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ADZoR! | 1062 | 0.23 | 27 min |
| #2 | ADZoR1 | 709 | 0.25 | 18 min |
| #3 | MattyR | 590 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #4 | SKIZ | 550 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #5 | turtz | 507 | 0.08 | 14 min |





