








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 902 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 372 matches | ||
| Faceit | 234 matches | ||
| Wingman | 184 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7517 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 40,917 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12163 | 30% |
| Smokes | 10302 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 10229 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 8223 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,470,415 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1475 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sniipper1-_^ | 58% | 148 |
| #2 | jeesus | 57% | 184 |
| #3 | jykKe | 56% | 102 |
| #4 | jaakk O))) | 55% | 126 |
| #5 | kabo8D | 54% | 120 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Sn4p-_^ | 54% | 100 |
| #7 | Hevosenleuka Joe | 52% | 252 |
| #8 | ana | 52% | 609 |
| #9 | Da Bälts | 52% | 221 |
| #10 | Jägermeister :) | 44% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ana | 9 | 0.0008 |
| #2 | Da Bälts | 6 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | jeesus | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Hevosenleuka Joe | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | kabo8D | 5 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ana | 2139 | 0.19 | 62 min |
| #2 | Da Bälts | 1153 | 0.24 | 29 min |
| #3 | Hevosenleuka Joe | 1121 | 0.21 | 29 min |
| #4 | jeesus | 502 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #5 | jykKe | 423 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ana | +2.20 | 71 | 74 |
| #2 | jykKe | +2.03 | 77 | 62 |
| #3 | Sniipper1-_^ | +1.90 | 72 | 74 |
| #4 | jeesus | +1.67 | 74 | 69 |
| #5 | Sn4p-_^ | +1.48 | 76 | 74 |





