








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 313 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 359 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1763 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,424 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2505 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2304 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2672 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2943 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,617,315 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 35 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Пряная курица | 49% | 173 |
| #2 | Adam "Arisk" Operchal | 48% | 44 |
| #3 | Neivster | 47% | 227 |
| #4 | Turb0 | 44% | 193 |
| #5 | Lord Stonewall | 43% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Lord Stonewall | 43% | 74 |
| #6 | 4000 | 40% | 107 |
| #7 | Madiii | 39% | 132 |
| #8 | Drake | 29% | 48 |
| #9 | Bamsepojken | 27% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Neivster | 37 | 0.0080 |
| #2 | Adam "Arisk" Operchal | 28 | 0.0302 |
| #3 | Bamsepojken | 24 | 0.0140 |
| #4 | Madiii | 22 | 0.0082 |
| #5 | Turb0 | 15 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Neivster | 367 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #2 | 4000 | 215 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | Пряная курица | 206 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | Bamsepojken | 169 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #5 | Turb0 | 148 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lord Stonewall | +5.78 | 82 | 27 |
| #2 | Neivster | +2.83 | 65 | 46 |
| #3 | Пряная курица | +2.70 | 71 | 47 |
| #4 | 4000 | +2.09 | 39 | 41 |
| #5 | Drake | +1.66 | 47 | 27 |





