








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 859 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 205 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3115 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,117 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3888 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3514 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2359 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2356 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,444,343 of utility $198 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 414 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Löschen | 50% | 30 |
| #2 | Fresh Dumbledore | 48% | 288 |
| #3 | The one and only Deagle Double G | 46% | 212 |
| #4 | fraim | 45% | 83 |
| #5 | FriedrichS | 32% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Löschen | 50% | 30 |
| #2 | Fresh Dumbledore | 48% | 288 |
| #3 | The one and only Deagle Double G | 46% | 212 |
| #4 | fraim | 45% | 83 |
| #5 | FriedrichS | 32% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The one and only Deagle Double G | 18 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | Fresh Dumbledore | 13 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | FriedrichS | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | fraim | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | Löschen | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fresh Dumbledore | 1415 | 0.24 | 38 min |
| #2 | The one and only Deagle Double G | 570 | 0.13 | 15 min |
| #3 | Löschen | 162 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #4 | fraim | 78 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | FriedrichS | 11 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fresh Dumbledore | +1.12 | 60 | 75 |
| #2 | woyzeck | +0.24 | 61 | 62 |
| #3 | The one and only Deagle Double G | -0.68 | 42 | 64 |
| #4 | Löschen | -0.86 | 22 | 73 |
| #5 | fraim | -1.88 | 43 | 47 |





