








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 80 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1974 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,633 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 667 | 14% |
| Smokes | 1407 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1673 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 886 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $802,986 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 51 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snife | 70% | 20 |
| #2 | Doctor Dust | 52% | 52 |
| #3 | mcn | 48% | 46 |
| #4 | K3nfloww | 44% | 144 |
| #5 | Twitch Yeavy | 44% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Doctor Dust | 52% | 52 |
| #3 | mcn | 48% | 46 |
| #4 | K3nfloww | 44% | 144 |
| #5 | Twitch Yeavy | 44% | 101 |
| #6 | Guangdong Tigah | 38% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | K3nfloww | 9 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Twitch Yeavy | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Guangdong Tigah | 2 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Doctor Dust | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Twitch Yeavy | 267 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #2 | mcn | 212 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #3 | Doctor Dust | 193 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #4 | K3nfloww | 111 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | Snife | 44 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Snife | +3.27 | 76 | 51 |
| #2 | Twitch Yeavy | +0.64 | 37 | 60 |
| #3 | Scritch | +0.49 | 25 | 45 |
| #4 | mcn | -1.01 | 25 | 63 |
| #5 | Doctor Dust | -1.62 | 18 | 62 |





