








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 253 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1953 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,972 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1209 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1652 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1671 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1440 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $545,543 of utility $123 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Corvax | 73% | 37 |
| #2 | Moxsan | 63% | 27 |
| #3 | SUPR☰MACY | 61% | 18 |
| #4 | aksel | 59% | 27 |
| #5 | blitzerin0 | 57% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Selveste | 9 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | adrian | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Snog | 1 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | blitzerin0 | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Selveste | 183 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #2 | Corvax | 119 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | adrian | 109 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | henz | 105 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | Snog | 55 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aksel | +2.69 | 82 | 56 |
| #2 | Corvax | +2.33 | 90 | 68 |
| #3 | henz | +2.15 | 79 | 75 |
| #4 | Moxsan | +1.39 | 69 | 59 |
| #5 | adrian | +0.85 | 84 | 68 |





