








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 400 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 221 matches | ||
| Faceit | 148 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6387 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,472 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2339 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3327 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3436 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3370 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,704,573 of utility $177 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 354 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | weirDs- | 55% | 118 |
| #9 | dav0ke | 54% | 267 |
| #10 | ColonelMichel | 54% | 99 |
| #11 | Corn | 52% | 31 |
| #12 | p | 49% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | spGEEッ | 13 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | gravityy | 9 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | dav0ke | 8 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | ColonelMichel | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | core | 4 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dav0ke | 941 | 0.17 | 28 min |
| #2 | gravityy | 933 | 0.15 | 26 min |
| #3 | spGEEッ | 777 | 0.14 | 21 min |
| #4 | core | 334 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #5 | ColonelMichel | 311 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | flipp | +1.93 | 90 | 52 |
| #2 | gravityy | +1.41 | 83 | 68 |
| #3 | GRMZ | +1.02 | 69 | 69 |
| #4 | NARCO | +0.66 | 79 | 61 |
| #5 | dav0ke | +0.31 | 73 | 74 |





