








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 176 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September

The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 157 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1405 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,041 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1385 | 23% |
| Smokes | 1828 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1502 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1326 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $986,923 of utility $200 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 24 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dr. Skippos von Lauchus II | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | SΔKURΔ | 46% | 150 |
| #3 | The Hoover | 43% | 67 |
| #4 | Batman #Back | 43% | 138 |
| #5 | yaNkee :R | 42% | 165 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | SΔKURΔ | 46% | 150 |
| #3 | The Hoover | 43% | 67 |
| #4 | Batman #Back | 43% | 138 |
| #5 | yaNkee :R | 42% | 165 |
| #6 | Senshi | 35% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yaNkee :R | 7 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Batman #Back | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | The Hoover | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | SΔKURΔ | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Senshi | 2 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SΔKURΔ | 271 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #2 | yaNkee :R | 267 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #3 | Batman #Back | 222 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | Senshi | 85 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | The Hoover | 53 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yaNkee :R | +4.96 | 75 | 70 |
| #2 | Dr. Skippos von Lauchus II | +3.78 | 46 | 52 |
| #3 | SΔKURΔ | +2.01 | 67 | 75 |
| #4 | Batman #Back | +1.42 | 50 | 68 |
| #5 | Senshi | -1.39 | 56 | 59 |





