








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 202 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 136 matches | ||
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1514 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,823 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3578 | 41% |
| Smokes | 2416 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1315 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1514 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $702,276 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 169 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pautos | 59% | 80 |
| #2 | BubbeLess | 55% | 86 |
| #3 | THE_DEAD | 54% | 41 |
| #4 | ralleh - PlayerForge.gg | 52% | 21 |
| #5 | Wôôpa | 50% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ✪ R!pper | | 47% | 19 |
| #10 | Gandhøe | 44% | 16 |
| #11 | Birdsong | 42% | 45 |
| #12 | -R0xy- | 40% | 25 |
| #13 | (ง •`_´•)ง | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chairface | 451 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #2 | BubbeLess | 297 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | Pautos | 165 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | Wôôpa | 139 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | NuggetGuardian | 126 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ralleh - PlayerForge.gg | +4.69 | 73 | 72 |
| #2 | Pautos | +4.17 | 81 | 77 |
| #3 | Birdsong | +0.96 | 58 | 65 |
| #4 | Chairface | +0.87 | 73 | 67 |
| #5 | THE_DEAD | +0.85 | 80 | 71 |





