








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 397 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 250 matches | ||
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 254 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3349 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,652 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6101 | 30% |
| Smokes | 4899 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5632 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4020 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $966,191 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 56 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MCscufterface | 67% | 88 |
| #2 | Tel | 65% | 46 |
| #3 | Madmardio | 65% | 155 |
| #4 | g0Kauf | 65% | 105 |
| #5 | vankoj | 64% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0Kauf | 545 | 0.24 | 15 min |
| #2 | Madmardio | 461 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #3 | greenie | 386 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #4 | Chairface | 208 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #5 | -Trash | 205 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Madmardio | +3.97 | 82 | 73 |
| #2 | g0Kauf | +3.31 | 74 | 70 |
| #3 | Pautos | +3.23 | 82 | 78 |
| #4 | ✪Kati0N✪ | +2.60 | 84 | 76 |
| #5 | Benno | +1.81 | 90 | 64 |





