








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1232 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 377 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 145 matches | ||
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




148 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13104 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 48,079 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 16942 | 35% |
| Smokes | 12069 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 8457 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 10611 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,003,624 of utility $54 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 127 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZZZ | 94% | 80 |
| #2 | Tin | 91% | 259 |
| #3 | KAGE | 91% | 476 |
| #4 | 恶意跑打 | 90% | 302 |
| #5 | SN | 89% | 377 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 叻叻✌️✌ | 172 | 0.0129 |
| #2 | KAGE | 107 | 0.0129 |
| #3 | Ash1ey | 46 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | NellaFniKwohC | 30 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | Tin | 27 | 0.0059 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 叻叻✌️✌ | 3450 | 0.26 | 67 min |
| #2 | KAGE | 1986 | 0.24 | 50 min |
| #3 | NellaFniKwohC | 1486 | 0.23 | 34 min |
| #4 | Ash1ey | 891 | 0.09 | 17 min |
| #5 | 恶意跑打 | 884 | 0.17 | 21 min |





