








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3192 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Esplay | 400 matches | 2,075 | |
| Premier | 301 matches | ||
| Renown | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 131 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10053 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,491 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10608 | 28% |
| Smokes | 9995 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 9445 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 8443 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,074,604 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2328 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Aspeladden | 52% | 83 |
| #2 | Therese91♥ッ | 51% | 134 |
| #3 | Majzs | 50% | 84 |
| #4 | Mantipanti | 48% | 88 |
| #5 | Rizla | 47% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Majzs | 50% | 84 |
| #4 | Mantipanti | 48% | 88 |
| #5 | Rizla | 47% | 93 |
| #6 | Stratus/// | 44% | 55 |
| #7 | Mr Reese | 42% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mantipanti | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | Mr Reese | 4 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Therese91♥ッ | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | Rizla | 1 | 0.0005 |
| #5 | ✪ Aspeladden | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Aspeladden | 243 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #2 | Mantipanti | 228 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | Stratus/// | 228 | 0.18 | 8 min |
| #4 | Mr Reese | 208 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #5 | Majzs | 152 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Aspeladden | +3.49 | 87 | 64 |
| #2 | BB | Kiddinho | +2.34 | 81 | 77 |
| #3 | Mantipanti | +0.87 | 80 | 69 |
| #4 | Stratus/// | +0.20 | 73 | 67 |
| #5 | Mr Reese | -1.36 | 26 | 66 |





