








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 277 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 127 matches | ||
| Faceit | 110 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2667 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,029 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4042 | 31% |
| Smokes | 4312 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2894 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1781 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,014,432 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 363 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kevinnnbacon | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | FruitDealer | 56% | 16 |
| #3 | Donny Bals | 55% | 84 |
| #4 | brolexican | 55% | 66 |
| #5 | Gele Kangoeroe | 53% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | MonstrO | 47% | 43 |
| #11 | De gewassen panda | 46% | 70 |
| #12 | bubbless | 42% | 31 |
| #13 | SuperSammy | 41% | 34 |
| #14 | Koaskrokette | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sp1cy | 6 | 0.0146 |
| #2 | De gewassen panda | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | FruitDealer | 3 | 0.0096 |
| #4 | Donny Bals | 2 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | brolexican | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brolexican | 195 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #2 | Donny Bals | 144 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #3 | MonstrO | 106 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | De gewassen panda | 88 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Aaronairo | 76 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aaronairo | +3.31 | 76 | 64 |
| #2 | Sp1cy | +2.95 | 76 | 44 |
| #3 | MonstrO | +2.84 | 76 | 66 |
| #4 | FruitDealer | +1.99 | 66 | 43 |
| #5 | jimmy_jimenezzz | +1.90 | 64 | 70 |





