








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 243 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 127 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
828 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,956 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2554 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1639 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1470 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1293 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $682,520 of utility $191 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 232 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ph15hyzx | 49% | 129 |
| #2 | Zrtn | 47% | 123 |
| #3 | coderunner | 46% | 123 |
| #4 | zx-mattY | 46% | 166 |
| #5 | donbeezy | 43% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ph15hyzx | 49% | 129 |
| #2 | Zrtn | 47% | 123 |
| #3 | coderunner | 46% | 123 |
| #4 | zx-mattY | 46% | 166 |
| #5 | donbeezy | 43% | 99 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | donbeezy | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | zx-mattY | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | ph15hyzx | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | coderunner | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zx-mattY | 487 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #2 | ph15hyzx | 464 | 0.17 | 14 min |
| #3 | Zrtn | 325 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #4 | donbeezy | 229 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #5 | coderunner | 36 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | coderunner | +1.97 | 79 | 39 |
| #2 | zx-mattY | +1.58 | 69 | 67 |
| #3 | Zrtn | +0.84 | 69 | 77 |
| #4 | ph15hyzx | -1.37 | 40 | 82 |
| #5 | donbeezy | -1.52 | 39 | 75 |





