








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 871 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 139 matches | ||
| Esplay | 117 matches | 2,162 | |
| Faceit | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4798 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,845 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6103 | 28% |
| Smokes | 5587 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4610 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 5545 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $810,855 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 129 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Topgunner83 | 78% | 23 |
| #2 | gimme the boiii | 67% | 24 |
| #3 | develo-- | 67% | 30 |
| #4 | HIland | 65% | 46 |
| #5 | aRCOn | 65% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #17 | Gingoz | 50% | 32 |
| #18 | Daniii | 50% | 80 |
| #19 | ChuckBass^ | 48% | 114 |
| #20 | Haika | 48% | 21 |
| #21 | Taake | 48% | 80 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Daniii | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | parow | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | ZeRostyle! | 4 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | gimme the boiii | 4 | 0.0074 |
| #5 | STH ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mIKAELP | +2.20 | 58 | 75 |
| #2 | parow | +1.75 | 68 | 69 |
| #3 | HIland | +1.53 | 77 | 73 |
| #4 | gimme the boiii | +1.49 | 58 | 84 |
| #5 | duvel | +1.07 | 67 | 78 |





