








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 336 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 69 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2846 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,556 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6121 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5192 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 5134 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6109 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,055,703 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 30 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rubaka | 71% | 24 |
| #2 | oNx | 68% | 37 |
| #3 | sundae | 64% | 53 |
| #4 | 🔴 | 58% | 36 |
| #5 | CuRRy the Viper | 48% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | <EiErnaCkeN GoEs InfEcted> | 42% | 245 |
| #9 | iT´s_noobY™ summacum.works | 39% | 214 |
| #10 | Cherry | 38% | 329 |
| #11 | ✪SCufFeX | 34% | 83 |
| #12 | Own4IcoN | 30% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cherry | 9 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | iT´s_noobY™ summacum.works | 8 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | <EiErnaCkeN GoEs InfEcted> | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Own4IcoN | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | D!ck@ | 2 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cherry | 654 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #2 | iT´s_noobY™ summacum.works | 636 | 0.14 | 15 min |
| #3 | <EiErnaCkeN GoEs InfEcted> | 315 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| #4 | Narmonox | 268 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #5 | sundae | 192 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sundae | +4.69 | 90 | 64 |
| #2 | iT´s_noobY™ summacum.works | +3.55 | 76 | 65 |
| #3 | CuRRy the Viper | +3.45 | 69 | 77 |
| #4 | D!ck@ | +2.72 | 84 | 65 |
| #5 | Rubaka | +2.61 | 79 | 71 |





