








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 622 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 216 matches | ||
| Premier | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4530 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,102 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3242 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3833 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 5000 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 4027 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $856,992 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 145 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yaffa | 69% | 32 |
| #2 | smo | 64% | 22 |
| #3 | AnDu | 62% | 26 |
| #4 | ⓃⓄⓄⒹⓁⒺⓈ | 60% | 188 |
| #5 | holsee | 59% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⓃⓄⓄⒹⓁⒺⓈ | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | Devvbot. | 5 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Darn | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | smo | 3 | 0.0067 |
| #5 | smo | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⓃⓄⓄⒹⓁⒺⓈ | 617 | 0.15 | 17 min |
| #2 | Devvbot. | 348 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #3 | krist0ph3r | 227 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | smo | 221 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #5 | holsee | 215 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Magill | +3.50 | 73 | 70 |
| #2 | AnDu | +2.76 | 75 | 78 |
| #3 | smo | +2.10 | 71 | 65 |
| #4 | Devvbot. | +1.82 | 73 | 60 |
| #5 | smo | +1.17 | 74 | 59 |





