








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 280 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 242 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 51 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1859 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,744 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3551 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4527 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3447 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4219 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $659,069 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 94 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | MostazaJD | 43% | 54 |
| #9 | Juman^! | 37% | 38 |
| #10 | vaisent | 36% | 22 |
| #11 | Majin Boo :) | 34% | 47 |
| #12 | Mustard | 30% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alex | 12 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Mustard | 8 | 0.0177 |
| #3 | Juman^! | 6 | 0.0073 |
| #4 | Pemblues | 5 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | MostazaJD | 5 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c♛sttle | +3.53 | 41 | 52 |
| #2 | Juman^! | +2.06 | 25 | 88 |
| #3 | Pemblues | +1.73 | 55 | 72 |
| #4 | vaisent | +1.32 | 39 | 63 |
| #5 | Majin Boo :) | +0.62 | 45 | 51 |





