








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 604 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 325 matches | ||
| Wingman | 145 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 75 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4338 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,460 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1838 | 11% |
| Smokes | 5136 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 5623 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 4863 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,166,796 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 239 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vaisent | 53% | 60 |
| #2 | KaBooM | 52% | 31 |
| #3 | MostazaJD | 51% | 229 |
| #4 | Pemblues | 49% | 197 |
| #5 | nΛrΛnjitΛ | 48% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Alex | 46% | 57 |
| #8 | RaYmaN | 45% | 58 |
| #9 | Juman^! | 45% | 155 |
| #10 | Ravalero | 42% | 31 |
| #11 | ->TriLeRo<- | 34% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MostazaJD | 29 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | Juman^! | 25 | 0.0075 |
| #3 | Pemblues | 12 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Jhonny | 8 | 0.0073 |
| #5 | Alex | 8 | 0.0075 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juman^! | 604 | 0.18 | 21 min |
| #2 | MostazaJD | 586 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #3 | nΛrΛnjitΛ | 179 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | Pemblues | 167 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | vaisent | 138 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Juman^! | +2.24 | 30 | 91 |
| #2 | KaBooM | +2.09 | 65 | 61 |
| #3 | Pemblues | +0.93 | 59 | 72 |
| #4 | Jhonny | +0.74 | 67 | 68 |
| #5 | RaYmaN | -0.03 | 54 | 51 |





