








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 61 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Esplay | 5 matches | 1,383 | |
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1686 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,492 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1407 | 26% |
| Smokes | 783 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 2040 | 37% |
| Molotovs | 1262 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $731,410 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 120 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | discokjelle | 82% | 17 |
| #2 | eMMa Karlsson | 74% | 27 |
| #3 | almefjord | 69% | 26 |
| #4 | Husssar | 58% | 60 |
| #5 | eskill | 50% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Husssar | 58% | 60 |
| #5 | eskill | 50% | 90 |
| #6 | WozzeC | 47% | 76 |
| #7 | Bulk Hogan | 38% | 13 |
| #8 | NIGHTDOG | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eskill | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #2 | Husssar | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | almefjord | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | eMMa Karlsson | 1 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | NIGHTDOG | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WozzeC | 244 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | Husssar | 167 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #3 | eskill | 139 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | almefjord | 114 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #5 | eMMa Karlsson | 56 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | almefjord | +5.46 | 83 | 78 |
| #2 | discokjelle | +4.37 | 69 | 83 |
| #3 | WozzeC | +4.09 | 66 | 75 |
| #4 | eMMa Karlsson | +3.40 | 55 | 66 |
| #5 | NIGHTDOG | +2.51 | 77 | 61 |





