








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 248 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 157 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2588 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,165 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2328 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2247 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1935 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1655 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,001,141 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 600 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MADVILLAIN | 74% | 19 |
| #2 | dehkS_ | 71% | 21 |
| #3 | THRILA | 68% | 38 |
| #4 | yumbingus | 62% | 68 |
| #5 | The Atomic QLDer | 61% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | clug/hc | 54% | 187 |
| #9 | Nader | 53% | 194 |
| #10 | onliner | 53% | 40 |
| #11 | CHISEL CHIN CHUCK | 50% | 34 |
| #12 | snakeboy439 | 44% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clug/hc | 11 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | mae/hc | 10 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Nader | 9 | 0.0023 |
| #4 | The Atomic QLDer | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Procro- | 2 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clug/hc | 361 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #2 | The Atomic QLDer | 278 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #3 | Nader | 236 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #4 | mae/hc | 202 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | dehkS_ | 133 | 0.31 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MADVILLAIN | +4.13 | 84 | 44 |
| #2 | dehkS_ | +3.83 | 87 | 66 |
| #3 | THRILA | +2.25 | 79 | 54 |
| #4 | mae/hc | +2.20 | 76 | 57 |
| #5 | clug/hc | +1.33 | 72 | 48 |





