








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 169 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1457 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,582 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1175 | 33% |
| Smokes | 418 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 1017 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 972 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $281,356 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 35 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | razeh | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | Jaya | 61% | 18 |
| #3 | Phant0miina77 | 52% | 21 |
| #4 | Meluksli | 52% | 44 |
| #5 | pokka | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Cadillacmv3 | 40% | 30 |
| #10 | UninenVille | 38% | 47 |
| #11 | Watukas | 29% | 7 |
| #12 | Myrttisen kurkut | 22% | 9 |
| #13 | 𝗩𝗲𝗟𝗲𝗛𝗼 | 14% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UninenVille | 8 | 0.0084 |
| #2 | siika | 5 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | Asuna :3 | 5 | 0.0096 |
| #4 | Jaya | 4 | 0.0106 |
| #5 | pokka | 4 | 0.0122 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | siika | 177 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | Meluksli | 133 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #3 | UninenVille | 93 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #4 | Phant0miina77 | 48 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #5 | mehinosu | 42 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meluksli | +4.87 | 82 | 64 |
| #2 | razeh | +2.47 | 91 | 67 |
| #3 | pokka | +1.79 | 71 | 42 |
| #4 | Phant0miina77 | +1.75 | 66 | 60 |
| #5 | mehinosu | +0.11 | 77 | 41 |





