








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 495 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 233 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 59 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5765 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,910 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5090 | 30% |
| Smokes | 4600 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3578 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3642 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,214,026 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 399 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Huntteri | 63% | 46 |
| #2 | itsroT | 59% | 154 |
| #3 | blst | 59% | 237 |
| #4 | Crash | 58% | 122 |
| #5 | Timsku | 58% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | dANNY | 57% | 322 |
| #8 | ile | 57% | 253 |
| #9 | bobby | 56% | 50 |
| #10 | SaMi | 56% | 174 |
| #11 | discopöllö | 54% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dANNY | 8 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | ile | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | SaMi | 3 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | blst | 2 | 0.0004 |
| #5 | Crash | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dANNY | 1611 | 0.25 | 48 min |
| #2 | blst | 833 | 0.17 | 24 min |
| #3 | ile | 574 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #4 | itsroT | 350 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #5 | SaMi | 288 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Maddew | +2.50 | 84 | 65 |
| #2 | dANNY | +1.75 | 87 | 80 |
| #3 | bobby | +0.72 | 78 | 66 |
| #4 | itsroT | +0.44 | 74 | 62 |
| #5 | Timsku | -0.39 | 77 | 57 |





