








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1344 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 635 matches | ||
| Wingman | 319 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7547 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 42,514 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13477 | 32% |
| Smokes | 13258 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 5550 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 10229 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,156,153 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sLitH3rs | 54% | 247 |
| #2 | SCROBOT | 51% | 577 |
| #3 | bernie | 50% | 451 |
| #4 | theory^ | 49% | 246 |
| #5 | abK` | 47% | 253 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | efx | 46% | 109 |
| #8 | B.N.M | 45% | 60 |
| #9 | JMuRda5 | 44% | 113 |
| #10 | 𝖛𝖆𝖚𝖌𝖍𝖆𝖓 | 41% | 287 |
| #11 | Bluntman | 41% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bernie | 14 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | SCROBOT | 8 | 0.0007 |
| #3 | Swifteh^ | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | theory^ | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | sLitH3rs | 6 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bernie | 911 | 0.10 | 22 min |
| #2 | SCROBOT | 624 | 0.05 | 16 min |
| #3 | sLitH3rs | 564 | 0.11 | 16 min |
| #4 | abK` | 495 | 0.09 | 11 min |
| #5 | theory^ | 348 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bernie | +1.61 | 75 | 60 |
| #2 | SCROBOT | +1.44 | 78 | 62 |
| #3 | abK` | +0.91 | 58 | 58 |
| #4 | theory^ | -0.14 | 49 | 61 |
| #5 | efx | -0.16 | 71 | 59 |





