








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 588 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 448 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5700 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,702 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3793 | 19% |
| Smokes | 5991 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5447 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 4471 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,418,519 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 352 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rasaqboi | 62% | 42 |
| #2 | ELUDEBEAR | 56% | 78 |
| #3 | Nautlu$ | 54% | 197 |
| #4 | nuunee | 53% | 114 |
| #5 | HvyArms | 52% | 215 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HvyArms | 11 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | ignit3r | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | getxclean |HB| | 6 | 0.0008 |
| #4 | Stoosh | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Nautlu$ | 5 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | getxclean |HB| | 864 | 0.12 | 22 min |
| #2 | HvyArms | 664 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #3 | Nautlu$ | 531 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| #4 | MJW | 426 | 0.08 | 12 min |
| #5 | ignit3r | 213 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | heat | +1.90 | 74 | 60 |
| #2 | Rasaqboi | +1.84 | 66 | 65 |
| #3 | ignit3r | +1.41 | 79 | 74 |
| #4 | MJW | +1.06 | 64 | 67 |
| #5 | maL^_^Ave | +0.99 | 58 | 66 |





